When I was a young child, on one occasion I became afraid that Count Duckula would get me in my sleep.

(Yes. Duckula. The vegetarian vampire. Yes.)

I got myself out of this by convincing myself that my bedside lamp was the functional equivalent of sunlight and all I'd need to do was turn it on to repel a vampire. This was no less logical than the original fear, and worked.

There, that's my embarrassing childhood admission. Your turn!

Incidentally, these days I'm able to deal with vampires by dual-classing atheist-suitheist. As atheist I get an automatic huge bonus to all rolls to disbelieve, while as self-proclaimed deity, everything to do with me is holy, yea, even unto mine farts.

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I gave blood this evening. They looked askance at me afterwards because I'm so tired-looking and kept me for a while for observation. When I didn't keel over (although one other patient looked alarmed and said I was going pale!¹) they let me meander on home, which is only a short walk in any case.

(I felt like saying "You shoulda seen me this morning. And all day at work. And all week, in fact." I've been looking pretty dazed for a long time, however much sleep I get, and we're talking up to 9hrs a night which is more than enough for anyone healthy.)

I have a Penguin biscuit. Seeing as I p-p-p-paid in blood for it, I am going to keep and consume it. If I can stabilise my weight, anyway; alarmingly, last weekend I gained like a kilo and a half for NO GORRAM REASON, SRSLY, I'd REMEMBER if I'd eaten anything fun, JEEZ could we randomly LOSE weight instead ya think?!

So, tomorrow is a bank holiday, then it's the weekend and then I have a week booked off work. Which is good. I owe some things, including an art exchange picture and replies to some emails, and want to finish off that little Suitov-Mistake story shortly. Also, need a haircut. When it gets to this length it curls up cutely at the ends, which, while obviously extremely manly, is not quite the effect I desire.

Next Tuesday: GeekUp or Magers? What a hectic social calendar. Stay tuned as my divided loyalties yawn, stretch and then serenely do whichever it was they were intending to do all along.

¹ I responded with an interested "Really?", checked my pulse (well, tried to find one and couldn't, which is usual) and then pinched my fingertips to check their flush reaction and temperature. "Hmm, they are somewhat cold." This coming from someone who had previously been slouching with a head cupped in one hand, elbow resting on the table, drooping eyelids and generally appearing semi-conscious, may have been a socially inappropriate response. It's possible I was supposed to have been alarmed instead or go and lie down or ask someone to loosen my stays or something. Probably just as well I didn't whip out a Von Luschan chart and ask him to quantify "pale". Oh well, they're shot of me for another four months.

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On my commute today, I have been mostly listening to Sherlock Holmes v Dracula. This is cool and I am secretly delighted every time I hear Holmes say the name "Mina".

What do you think of literary mashups, crossovers, pastiche-hybrids and the like? Do you find the idea excruciating (cross puns lol) or do you enjoy them in a spirit of absurdity?

Normally I'm the former, on this occasion the latter, because it's well written and fun.

Which characters do you think should never ever meet — not because their settings or genres are incompatible, but because it would be a really bad idea to get them in the same location?

Discuss.

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How are the bitey fallen! Since when are vampires reduced to angsty objects of lust for teenage girls, asks BBC Magazine?

Some amber with an unusual payload.

Pretty welding sparks.

"Hurrah, we've just accidentally dug into a magma chamber!" Oh, geologists. <3

Fascinating thing here about a follow-up to Milgram.

I thought spending my life with my foot in my mouth was bad...

Advice on chip pan fires has been changed.

Conifer pruned into plum pudding

Disappointing news. Cedric the Tassie devil, considered the best hope for his species because he seemed to be immune to the face cancer that's killing them, has developed tumours.

Winter medical myths 'debunked'

Mermaids! <3 Beautiful things.

Oi, hands off me beaver!

Sexy Muslim underwear. NO CONNECTION TO PREVIOUS ARTICLE COMMENTARY.

I want a robot. Do you too? So why aren't they selling them yet? Because, as this thing shows, they can't get anything about them right... except their names. And the cool ones of those are going fast!

The psychology of crying. Tear ducts are awesome. Psychology isn't, at least at this superficial level.

Now this really is awesome! Single virus used to convert adult cells to stem cells. There's a lot more to it, so read the full article if you think protein-making is just the coolest.

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